The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Synopsis: 

Eden’s life begins heading down a dangerous path when she’s raped by someone she trusted. Soon, her long kept secret begins to spoil her friendship and every possible relationship in her life. 

I’m So Upset

So upset… THAT I DIDN’T READ THIS SOONER! This book broke my heart several times over and I could hardly put it down. It’s not particularly my genre so my rating may be biased, but this review won’t be. 

Heart Achingly Beautiful

This definitely isn’t an easy subject to write about. Topics like weight problems, suicide, rape and bullying are all things that have to be executed correctly. The right message has to be conveyed to the audience cause the audience may consist of victims of these categories. 

Smith not only portrayed accurate tendencies of people who suffer from any type of abuse, but she also proceeded with caution and truth. There wasn’t a moment where things just all fell apart at once. But it gradually happens step by step; one bad decision after another bad decision. 

Characters

Everyone was true to character. Although Kevin was the catalyst of all this, we don’t really get a clear picture of him as an individual. There aren’t many scenes in the book that are about Kevin which I was a little disappointed about. We just get this shadow of who he is. 

I also was hoping for a breakthrough with Edy and her parents’ relationship, seeing as how they weren’t very nurturing towards her.

I also enjoyed the helping characters like her best friend, Mara, Cameron and her brother, Caelin. 

The internal dialogue was superb. This is really the key to making the reader feel what the main character is feeling. 

Moral of the Story

Amber Smith shows us all the symptoms of a person that has been sexually abused or raped. Throughout Eden’s high school years we see her endure things like slut shaming, bullying and harassment. The deeper message is Smith informing us on what to look for in a person that has fallen victim to assault. Not to mention the erratic change in her behavior and urge to suppress her emotions. These are all warning signs and they shouldn’t be taken lightly.